Things as of late have been insane and raucous and mystifying. I'm questioning everything, and now I have no idea what I want to do.
As things stand, I've been accepted everywhere I want to be accepted. My dream school accepted me, the program I really wanted accepted me, as did my second choice. Financially, I'll be pushing things by going with my dream choice. I desperately want to go, but I also need about $15,000 in extra money to do so, and I have no idea where I'm gonna get it. I applied for Fine Arts programs, and I haven't heard back, but now I'm questioning whether I really want to go into art. I love art, but as of late I've been incapable of producing anything, wanting to produce anything, or really having the time outside of class to do anything. I'm seriously considering taking the English Major I love as well, and leaving Art as a hobby. English has remained an enduring love for me, and it might be the way to go. Maybe with a minor or double major in Classics? I don't know.
My parents have kind of built up this expectation in terms of art, they didn't like it, but seem obsessed with it all the same. I want to go to my dream program, but money is tight as it is, and I think I'm being unfair by asking for such a thing. They'll never say that, but I know it's true. And logically, I have a younger brother going to university in three years, and he wants to be an engineer, EXPENSIVE.
I'm really confused, and I don't really know who to talk to, yay. Why is choosing my future so difficult and expensive? I think it's almost unfair to force me into such a decision so early, but at the same time, I don't want to take a year off (I know I'll get nothing done), and I don't want to stay in high school for another year. What a pickle I'm in. I wish there was something between high school and university.
Just a rant. I need money. Can I get money for ranting?
-Cambriane
PS. I finally saw that whole "I'm F*cking Matt Damon" and such forth, VERY FUNNY!









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"Through all the world there goes one long cry from the heart of the artist: Give me leave to do my utmost." - Isak Dineson
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stalkage.
*ninja*
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